Believe Me
by Philomela Kellswater
Summary: Sirius Black's thoughts about a friend of his, soon after he was arrested. Very sad and sappy. My first slash story. Don't like? Don't read...


Author's Note:  
Yeah, sure, I am JK Rowling and I own all these charachters. Did you think? You must be stupider than I thought.  
Bien sûr, JK Rowling would never write anything as bad as this. I hate this, but just to torture myself, I will put it up here. And, the program I wrote this in didn't have any spell checker, so if you can find any mistakes, it's not my fault... I did my best, but I don't always see my own mistakes. 

It must have been a February day when I first noticed. Yes, February 16th. I remember our Valentine's Day. You had gotten a few Valentine Cards, and you were very embarassed. I had gotten enough to paper the Common Room, and I didn't bother at all. That's just one difference between us. I could name lots of others, but I won't.  
It must have been February 16th, since still two days later you were blushing whenever somebody mentioned those Valentine Cards. James couldn't understand it, and he asked me what was wrong. I think I said that you being a werewolf had more problems with girls than anybody else. Or maybe that you hadn't got a card from the person you were in love with. I remember saying person, not girl. Anyway, this February 16th that I speak of, I noticed you for the first time. Don't think I'm mad for saying this, of course I had noticed you before. Like the first day on Hogwarts, when we were in that room waiting to be sorted. I noticed you, standing there all alone, looking shy and scared. I was with James, talking and laughing. We never appeard to be nervous. Not like you, who had it written all over your face. And I noticed you when you could answer all questions in class. We all just watched in awe, not knowing any answer, and you just had your hand in the air all the time. You got lot of points for Gryffindor all the time, and you deserved them. Too bad James and I lost so much of them doing things we were not supposed to do. But then James got the invisibility cloak, and suddenly Gryffindor lost fewer points then what seemed possible. We were still sneaking around everywhere, but now unnoticed. And now, when it was safer, you too came along sometimes. You know I liked that very much, don't you?  
You always sat by the window in class. You liked that, just like the rest of us. I and James used the window as an escape, we could look out and let our minds wander of. You were different, you always listened at class, so I never understood why you were so desperate to sit by the window. Until this February 16th that I keep mentioning. It must have been History of Magic, since I was desperatly trying to think of something less boring than whatever Binns was talking about. I looked around the room, and then I noticed you. You sat right infront of me, writing on your parchment. You have a very neat handwriting, did you know that? Almost like a girl's. And that's a compliment, although it doesn't sound like one. Anyway, I just couldn't take my eyes of you. You were sitting where the sun shone through the window, and I realised that you always did. You were constantly cold, always trying to be closest to the fire, or in the sun. Even in August, which can be very hot, you never was sitting in the shadow with the rest of us. Always a little distant, sitting all alone in the sun. Sometimes, when I thought you looked too lonely, I joined you in the sun, although I was way too hot already. You never seemed to mind my company, but you never seem to mind anything. Your thoughts are always hidden from the rest of us. Only sometimes I can see them in your eyes. Or I used to do, anyway. If we could see eachother now, I'm not sure I want to know what you'd be thinking. I can stand everybody else thinking I killed James and Lily, just not you. You must not think of me as a murderer. The rest of the world might believe whatever they want, if only you believe I'm innocent. But you don't. You might even hate me, not just for "betraying James and Lily", but for thinking you were the spy. Believe me, it was Peter who tricked me into believing it was you. And it was him, all the time. Please believe I'm innocent. Believe me, Moony. Please.


End file.
